[08:18:18] <Gaelith> I've been on the internet sine I was 12
[08:18:35] <Gaelith> I have an encyclopedic knowledge of pornography.
[08:19:35] <Rane> That must come in handy ever now and then.
[08:19:45] <Gaelith> Yes. Yes it does.
[08:19:48] <Gaelith> I hope to make a career of it.
[08:19:56] <Freddo> Your parents must be very proud :p
[08:20:06] <Gaelith> They're just glad I'm not a serial killer

[6:28am] <SleepyFreak> life?
[6:28am] <SleepyFreak> whats that?
[6:28am] <Sporks> It's a bowl of cereal!

(talking about where we keep our money savings)
<Alchemist> I keep it in a sock under my mattress
<Alchemist> Then I piss on the mattress so no one will touch it
<Alchemist> then I sleep on the floor

<Stev> waxing doesnt hurt too much if it's done properly
<Lowlife> we're men, stev
<Lowlife> we can't even spread butter properly
<Lowlife> :p

=============================================
yeah, it's lame to put it onhere myself
but noone else was going to do it, so,
sue me
:p

*Aristeo sets mode +b on Russiancleaninglady.
20:34 <Russiancleaninglady> what..
<Russiancleaninglady> ehh come on
<Russiancleaninglady> im sorry
<Russiancleaninglady> ok man ill keep quiet amigo
<Aristeo> Nope. Too late
<Russiancleaninglady> naaw man
<Russiancleaninglady> im bored
<Russiancleaninglady> please bro
<Aristeo> Okay...
<Russiancleaninglady> im beggin ya
*Aristeo sets mode -b on Russiancleaninglady.
<Russiancleaninglady> thanks man

---
*[text] = /me's not server commands.

[17:08:26] * Elf-AFK jams ur throat open
[17:08:32] * Elf-AFK inserts n wiggles
[17:08:43] * Elf-AFK removes n closes ur mouth
[17:08:50] <Elf-AFK> my unboring device :D
[17:09:10] <Elf-AFK> u should now feel warm n tingly for 20 mins

<Brain> i have a joke about a man who goes into a bar with a monkey
<Brain> he sits down with the monkey, and orders a pint
<Brain> while hes drinking his pint the monkey goes nuts and eats everything.... pool balls, menus, pint glasses
<Brain> the barman gets pissed and throws him out, he says 'YOURE BARRED, DONT EVER BRING THAT MONKEY BACK'
<Brain> next week the guy comes back, along with his monkey
<Brain> the barman says "i barred you and your damn monkey, go away"
<Brain> the man assures everyone that the monkey is alright now and he'll behave
<Brain> so the barman lets him in with his monkey and he sits down to drink his pint
<Brain> while hes drinking the monkey starts going around and picking stuff up, and shoving it up his ass
<Brain> the barman is livid! he says "i thought you said the monkey would behave?!"
<Brain> "oh yes... its just that after last time, when he ate a pint glass.... hes checking if theyll fit now before he eats them"
<Brain> :P

How to scar(e) people who ask for your a/s/l in IRC:
__________________________________________________

[11:01] * Spyder232 ([email protected]) has joined #uesp
[11:01] <Spyder232> hi peeps
[11:01] <@Aristeo> Hello!
[11:01] <Spyder232> asl?
[11:02] <Spyder232> !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!?|||?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?| ?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?||?|?|?|?|?|?|?|?|
[11:02] <@Aristeo> 14/f/cali, u?
[11:02] <Spyder232> 14/m/uk
[11:02] <@Aristeo> :D
[11:02] <Spyder232> u got msn or anything?
[11:03] <@Aristeo> I'm just kidding, I'm 36/m/Alabama
[11:03] * Spyder232 ([email protected]) Quit ( Client exited )

12:27pm --> LinDaa has joined #chatspike
12:28pm < LinDaa> goodness =.=
12:28pm < LinDaa> finally i got in
12:33pm <@Higurashi> That's what he said.

[02:13] <Creator|Laptop> this channel isnt even funny retardism, its just plain retardism.
[02:13] <Diablo-D3> Creator|Laptop: kash reads /b/, what do you expect?
[02:13] <Creator|Laptop> Diablo-D3: your not even a funny troll
[02:13] <Diablo-D3> *you're
[02:15] <AfterDeath> Grammer correcting: You may win the arguement, but everyone else will then see your a shithead.
[02:16] <nenolod> grammar*
[02:16] <AfterDeath> I rest my case.